The concept of emotional intelligence. Managing your emotions


The theory of emotional intelligence is now at the peak of popularity. When selecting new employees, as well as when assessing the results of current activities, advanced HR managers are paying more and more attention not to technical skills, but to personal characteristics that are part of emotional intelligence. In this article we will tell you whether it is worth making a big bet on emotional intellect employees and what it is all about.

Essence of the question

The concept of emotional intelligence was developed in 1990 by psychologists Peter Salovey of Yale University and John Mayer of the University of New Hampshire. Scientists have called emotional intelligence a set of skills such as accurately recognizing one's own and others' emotions, managing one's own and others' emotions, and using emotions to motivate, plan, and achieve goals.

However, this theory was popularized and brought to the masses by the American journalist Daniel Goleman. In 1995, his book “Emotional Intelligence” was published. Why it can matter more than IQ, which quickly became a bestseller. In the book Goleman focused on the aspect practical application theories of emotional intelligence in life and at work. He identified five main components of emotional intelligence:

Self-awareness is the ability to adequately assess one’s abilities, strengths and weaknesses. The ability to understand your emotions and make decisions based on this.

Self-regulation - the ability to control emotions so that they do not interfere current work. The willingness to delay immediate gratification to achieve a long-term goal. The ability to quickly recover from stress.

Motivation is the ability to use deep-seated inclinations and preferences to achieve a goal, take initiative, not retreat and not despair because of failures.

Empathy is the ability to understand what other people feel, the ability to put oneself in their place.

Social skills - the ability to read emotions in relationships between people. Use this skill in the negotiation process, when resolving disputes, to persuade management and organize teamwork.

Goleman's books became popular in part because of their provocative claims that emotional intelligence matters more than academic intelligence, both personally and professionally.

Goleman's ideas spread not only to newspapers and magazines, but also found a response in scientific circles. Soon, research emerged showing that emotional intelligence helps you advance your career, maintain good health, and be satisfied with your life.

Goleman points out the need to develop emotional intelligence not only in areas related to people, but also in information areas - in the work of programmers, accountants, scientists. Goleman also suggests introducing emotional intelligence training programs in schools and workplaces.

Dark side of the force

However, not all scientists share this approach. Professor of management and psychology at the Wharton School of Business at the University of Pennsylvania Adam Grant warns that enthusiasm has blinded us and hidden the dark side of emotional intelligence.

The more people hone their emotional skills, the more easily they manipulate others. How better person controls his emotions, the easier it is for him to hide his true feelings. If you know how others feel, it is easy to play on other people's experiences and force people to act contrary to their own interests.

In 2011, psychologist Stéphane Côté from the University of Toronto studied interpersonal relationships in the workplace and concluded that people with high emotional intelligence tend to use it for dishonest purposes. For example, to undermine a colleague’s authority or confuse him.

In the hands of people who care only about their own interests, emotional intelligence becomes a powerful tool manipulation. Leaders who are masters at managing emotions rob their audience of their ability to think critically. The consequences can be dire.

Professor Jochen Menges from Cambridge University proved: when a leader gives an inspiring speech filled with emotions, the audience understands the essence of the speech less well and remembers less information, although the experiment participants themselves seem to remember more. One such inspiring leader was Adolf Hitler.

Professor from University College London Martin Kilduff emphasizes that people with a high level of emotional intelligence disguise some emotions as others for the purpose of personal gain. They deliberately imitate emotions in order to create a favorable impression of themselves.

While a person with developed cognitive abilities can quickly and efficiently analyze available options and draw conclusions, a person with developed emotional intelligence evaluates and controls emotions to achieve various goals, including personal advancement.

To the arsenal emotional manipulator These include strategies such as focusing on the emotions of key leaders, imitating and masking emotions for personal gain, provoking desired emotions in other people, and managing emotionally charged communications.

Success rate

The link between emotional intelligence and potential success in work life is also controversial among scientists. It may be that in areas where understanding emotions is critical, high emotional intelligence is associated with better outcomes. However, in other areas of activity such dependence may be absent or even negative.

In 2010, psychologists Dana Joseph of the University of Central Florida and Daniel Newman of the University of Illinois analyzed all previous Scientific research, who studied the relationship between emotional intelligence and job performance. Scientists looked at thousands of workers in 200 areas, but did not find a clear relationship.

Salespeople, realtors, call center agents, and consultants who were better at reading and managing emotions were actually more successful at work. They also coped more effectively with stressful situations and even in difficult situations did the job with a smile.

In areas of activity where developed emotional skills were not required, the results were the opposite. The higher the emotional intelligence of employees, the lower their achievements at work. It turns out that emotional intelligence only harmed them.

This could be partly explained by the fact that workers with high emotional intelligence paid attention to emotions instead of focusing on work tasks. When you need to analyze numbers, you should not be distracted by studying facial expressions, body language and intonation of the people around you. Also, high emotional intelligence can play a cruel joke on its owner when making important decisions.

Psychologists Elisha Baker, Liane ten Brinke and Stephen Porter from the University of British Columbia studied the relationship between emotional intelligence and the ability to recognize deception in 2012.

Participants in the experiment were shown video messages from people begging for the return of a missing family member. In fact, half of them were responsible for the murder or disappearance of a relative.

Participants with high emotional intelligence were overly confident that they were right when assessing the sincerity of appeals, and also noted greater empathy for deceivers.

In addition, one component of emotional intelligence—the ability to perceive and express emotions—showed a negative relationship with accuracy in identifying false claims.

Paradoxically, emotional intelligence can make it difficult to recognize lies.

The founder of the concept of emotional intelligence, John Mayer, also refutes the assertion that emotional intelligence is the best indicator of success in life. In one of his articles, he emphasized that this opinion has been replicated by journalists, but has no scientific basis.

Practical point

Obviously, hiring people based solely on their level of emotional intelligence is reckless.

You shouldn’t forget about cognitive abilities either. They determine our ability to learn new things and, if necessary, help develop emotional intelligence.

If working in your company requires employees to have developed emotional intelligence, then when implementing a training program, the recommendations given by Daniel Goleman “Emotional Intelligence in Business” will help you.

Analyze the functionality of the position and personal characteristics employee. Make a list of the most important competencies for the position. Find out which competencies are poorly developed in a particular employee and focus his training on them. Don't try to cover everything at once.

Set clear goals and motivate your staff. Explain to people how developing a particular competency will help them in their career growth and professional development. Write down clear sequential steps to achieve your goal.

Emotional intelligence (EQ) is the ability to identify, use, understand and manage one's own emotions in a positive way, for example to relieve stress, overcome difficulties and defuse conflicts. This ability also allows you to recognize the emotional state of other people.

Emotional intelligence can be improved at any time in life.

However, there is a big difference between studying emotional intelligence and applying it in practice. You may know you need to take certain steps, but that doesn't mean you'll take them, especially if you're under stress. In order to change your behavioral habits, you need to learn to cope with.

Emotional intelligence generally consists of five components:

  • Self-knowledge. you admit own emotions and understand how they influence your thoughts and behavior. You know your strengths and weaknesses, you have confidence in your own abilities.
  • Self-control. You know how to control impulsive feelings, manage your emotions in relationships, take initiative, follow through on commitments, and adapt to changing circumstances.
  • Empathy. You know how to develop and maintain good relationships, communicate easily, inspire and guide others.
  • Motivation. You imagine your goal and are clearly aware of each next step towards your dream.
  • Social skills. You can understand the emotions, needs and problems of other people, recognize non-verbal cues, feel comfortable in society, determine a person's status in a group or organization, and resolve conflicts within a team.

Why emotional intelligence is so important

Life shows that smart people do not always achieve success and high social status. Surely you remember a couple of people who have excellent academic knowledge, but at the same time are socially incompetent both at work and in their personal lives.

A high IQ does not guarantee success in your career and family. Yes, he will help you get into a prestigious educational institution, but only emotional intelligence will help you when you need to calm down your emotions before final exams. In tandem, IQ and EQ reinforce each other.

Thus, emotional intelligence affects:

  • School performance and productivity at work. Emotional intelligence will help you navigate complex social relationships in the workplace, become a leader and motivate others, and succeed in your career. Many companies evaluate the emotional intelligence of candidates during an interview, considering it to be at least important characteristic than professional competencies.
  • Physical health. If you can't manage your emotions, you probably can't manage stress. This can lead to serious health problems. Uncontrolled stress increases blood pressure and suppresses immune system, increases the risk of heart attack, promotes infertility and accelerates aging.
  • Mental condition. Uncontrolled emotions and stress affect mental health, making us vulnerable to anxiety and depression. If you don't manage your own emotions, you won't be able to build strong relationships. As a result, a feeling of loneliness and isolation will come.
  • Relationship. By understanding and managing your own emotions, you will learn to express yourself and feel those around you. This will allow you to communicate more effectively and build trust.

What will help you develop emotional intelligence?

1. Self-knowledge

Psychologists argue that current experiences are a reflection of earlier emotional experiences. This means that your ability to perceive anger, sadness, fear and joy is likely influenced by the quality and intensity of your emotions early in life.

If you have valued and understood your emotions in the past, they will become valuable assets in the future. If the experience was painful and confusing, you will probably do everything possible to distance yourself from it. However, you should not distance yourself even from negative feelings, because acceptance and awareness of your emotional state- the key to understanding how experiences affect your thoughts and actions.

Ask yourself a few questions:

  • Are the emotions accompanied by physical sensations in the stomach, throat, or chest?
  • Have you ever experienced feelings that were clearly reflected in your facial expressions?
  • Can you experience strong feelings that completely absorb your attention and the attention of others?
  • Do you monitor your emotions when making decisions?

If there is even one negative answer, your emotions are suppressed or turned off. In order to have healthy emotional intelligence, you must open up to your experiences and let them into your comfort zone.

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Here are the surest ways to improve self-knowledge:

  • Practice mindfulness. That is, deliberately focusing attention on the present moment. Mindfulness is often associated with Buddhism, but most of the world's religions practice something similar in the form of prayer. It relieves anxiety, calms and invigorates, and builds character.
  • Keep a diary. At the end of each day, write down what happened to you, how you felt and how you dealt with difficulties. Periodically look back and analyze typical situations, note where you underdid or overdid it.
  • Ask your loved ones who they see you as. Feedback from multiple people will reveal your strengths and weaknesses. Don't forget to record everything and look for patterns. The main thing is not to argue or object. It is important for you to look at yourself through someone else's eyes.

2. Self-control

Awareness of feelings is the first step to emotional management. You must use your emotions to make constructive decisions and behavior. When you become overly stressed, you may lose control and become less thoughtful.

Remember how easy it is to think rationally in a state of overstrain. Probably not. This happens because the brain withdraws from thought processes and switches to an overabundance of feelings.

Emotions are important pieces of information that tell us about ourselves and others. However, under stress, we become depressed and lose control of ourselves. Learn to cope with stress. This will help you control feelings and behavior, manage relationships, take initiative, follow through on commitments, and adapt to a changing world.


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So how can you learn self-control? Surely you've heard about the old-fashioned method of counting to ten when you're angry.

It is not always possible to suppress anger or depression, however, a physical push will be appropriate. If you feel tired, do some exercises. If you can't muster the strength, slap yourself in the face. In general, use any physical force that will produce mild shock and break the vicious cycle.

3. Empathy

We constantly focus on what is most important to us. However, our emotions are only half of the relationship. All other people also have their own feelings, desires, triggers and fears. Therefore, empathy is an extremely important life skill.


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Try out a few tips to help you become an empath:

  • Talk less, listen more. This Golden Rule any sincerely empathetic person. Of course, you cannot let the whole gamut of another person’s feelings pass through you, but you can try to hear him. Just let the person speak without interrupting him with your thoughts. This is difficult, especially if there are strong negative emotions. However, almost any connection will become stronger just because you ask before entering into a conversation.
  • Accept the opposite opinion despite your own position. To understand what motivates a person, you need to be in his place. If you think your boss is being reckless, try to justify it in your head. Perhaps you would do the same if you were in his shoes.
  • Understand the difference between saying “I know” and “I understand.” The first indicates that you allegedly had a similar life experience. The second indicates that you thought about the situation and played it out on your own behalf. Of course, understanding other people's problems is a more trusting and truthful level of relationship.

Empathy involves your reaction, but it must come at the right time. If someone is about to burst into tears or is in deep pain, don't try to numb the feelings. The person needs to express his emotions, and he will need your help.

4. Motivation

When we talk about motivation as a component of emotional intelligence, we mean the inner core, and not the psychological strength to get your body out of bed. As psychologists say, our core is located in the prefrontal cortex of the brain. She begins to be active at the mere thought of performing a significant task.

The goal can be a career, a family, a piece of art, or anything as long as it has significant meaning in your life. When motivation gets down to business, it combines with reality, and we take real actions. To start a family, motivated people start dating. To advance in their careers, motivated people undertake self-education.


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How to find your core? First of all, you need to find out your own values. Many of us are so busy that we don’t have time to dig into ourselves and determine our priorities. It’s even worse if a person does work that directly contradicts his worldview and principles.

Secondly, you should transfer your goal to paper and write it down in detail. At the same time, it is necessary to understand that great success is greatly extended over time. It consists of small victories and the bitterness of defeats.

5. Social skills

Social skills are the ability to understand what people around you constantly address to you. These signals give a clear picture of what a person is experiencing and what is truly important to him. In order to accept nonverbal signals, you need to suspend your thoughts, not think about the goals and objectives that you are pursuing while being next to the person.


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Social skills cannot work for you if you are thinking about something other than the current event. When we are immersed in memories or transported to the future, we are simply not in the present. This makes it difficult to pick up on subtle nonverbal cues.

Don't be under any illusions about multitasking. Yes, we can switch between topics very quickly, but in the transition we lose the subtle emotional shift that helps us understand other people.

Social skills are good to improve by resolving disagreements:

  • Make time for each other and then return to the problem. In romantic relationships, it is necessary to remind your partner that behind criticism there is care and love.
  • Make sure both parties are clear about the cause of the conflict. Offer a mutually beneficial solution that takes into account mutual desires and eliminates additional requirements.
  • End on one note, even if it's not entirely positive. Let your boss, colleague or significant other know that you are moving in the same direction, albeit with different points of view.

Along with conflict resolution, you need to teach yourself to get to know each other, maintain a conversation, and play. At the same time, it is advisable to study in advance the mentality of people of different nations.

Victoria Shimanskaya is a psychologist, a leading specialist in emotional intelligence (EQ) research in Russia, the author of the “Monsiki” methodology for developing children’s EQ, a partner in the EQ-factor Laboratory, a leader of master classes and trainings on the topic of EQ - about the intellectual-emotional profile of a person and its roles in organizing and running a business.

Key Factors of Emotional Intelligence

Emotional intelligence is talked about often and a lot today. The need to develop emotional intelligence has been proven more than once by scientists and various examples from life and business.

It is obvious that a person who has a higher level of emotional intelligence perceives reality more adequately and reacts to it and interacts with it much more effectively. This applies to almost all communications - both interpersonal and social; subjective and objective experiences; abstract and concrete concepts. Thus, emotional intelligence has become one of the new tools for business management, building effective communications and management.

Perception of information occurs through sensory systems. In this case, key areas of the brain act first, and then reactions of the autonomic nervous, muscular and other systems occur. Interaction with information, with yourself and the world around you is built depending on the degree of development of the key drivers of emotional intelligence: awareness, self-esteem, motivation, adaptability.

Drivers actually contain basic personality traits, but they are not immutable and can evolve.

Each driver can be unlocked through four skills:

  1. awareness through awareness of your thoughts and emotions, your body and behavior;
  2. self-esteem through a positive perception of the world and determination, as well as through acceptance and assertiveness (a person’s ability not to depend on external influences and assessments, to independently regulate their own behavior and be responsible for it);
  3. motivation through the desire for self-actualization and determination, as well as through an open perception of the new, strong goal setting and objective experience of failures;
  4. adaptability through conscious empathy for another person - empathy, stress resistance, decision making and communication skills.

Emotional Quotient

It is necessary to pay attention to the fact that emotional intelligence does not exist separately from intelligence. Over the past three decades, science has made significant progress in studying the interaction of the emotional and intellectual spheres (IQ and EQ) from the point of view of brain activity, psychology and business.

“It is very important to understand that emotional intelligence is not the opposite of intelligence, it is not the triumph of the heart over the head - it is the only way the two intersect,” once said David R. Caruso, a psychologist, professor of psychology at Yale University (USA), an expert in the field management and co-author of the concept of emotional intelligence.

Along with the well-known abbreviation IQ (English Intelligence Quotient - intelligence coefficient or mental development coefficient), there is the concept of the emotional coefficient EQ ( English. Emotional Quotient), which was introduced by clinical physiologist Ruven Bar-On back in 1985. In 1996, at the meeting of the American Psychological Association in Toronto, he presented his EQ-i (Emotional Quotient Inventory) test, which contained a list of questions to determine the emotional intelligence coefficient, from which the now famous “Bar-On model of emotional intelligence” was born.

Despite the fact that the interaction of IQ and EQ is recognized by many researchers, the first model that clearly showed the interaction of these two coefficients was developed by Russian scientists at the EQ-factor Laboratory for the Study of Emotional Intelligence under the leadership of N. Koro and V. Shimanskaya.

Intellectual-emotional personality profile of a leader

This model acts integral part intellectual-emotional personality profile IEPP. According to this model, emotional intelligence EQ is a kind of base of the personality pyramid in the coordinate system. The vectors of this system are EQ drivers and form various behavior strategies in various areas of life:

  1. awareness – “the strategy of philosophers”;
  2. self-esteem - “star strategy”;
  3. motivation – “heroes’ strategy”;
  4. adaptability - “managers’ strategy.”

When emotional intelligence is combined with the IQ vector of intelligence, a “creators’ strategy” is formed - a strategy that is key in all areas of life, and even more so in business.

It is the “strategy of creators” that allows one to realize a person’s potential so much that ultimately he reaches the highest level of self-realization. Therefore, the larger the volume of this pyramid (due to the development of EQ drivers and IQ itself), the more opportunities a person will have to influence his life, the lives of other people and the world as a whole.

In the modern world, any leader and entrepreneur must be a creator - create not just a product or service, but the best product, the best service, the best service and the best experience. And this is almost impossible without the ability to manage your emotions.

How to develop EQ?

As already noted in this article, the development of EQ occurs through the development of its main factors - drivers. Therefore, it is necessary to develop them first.

1. Exercise to develop “awareness”

  1. Close your ears and concentrate on environment, try to see all the details. The picture will become “brighter” and you will notice something that you didn’t pay attention to before.
  2. Then close your eyes and concentrate on the sounds. In a normal situation, we subconsciously concentrate on an area of ​​no more than 1.5 meters around us. By “expanding” our hearing, we begin to notice the nuances of natural and mechanical.
  3. Close your eyes and ears together. Feel how your body interacts with the outside world - for example, the touch of the wind or grass if you are ready to take off your shoes.

It is enough to do this exercise once a week so that your ability to recognize the voice intonations of your interlocutors and the nuances of facial expressions become significantly higher. This will allow you to more accurately determine the explicit and hidden messages of your interlocutors and, most importantly, your own reaction to certain processes, as well as understand how your body reacts to information and how it experiences emotions.

2. To develop “adaptability”, a simple training using “emotion cards” is suitable.

You pretend to be angry, happy, sad or interested, depending on which card you draw. It's simple and effective method“work out” your emotional expression. At the same time, your effectiveness as a negotiator increases several times.

3. To develop “self-esteem”, you should first master power poses

Power poses are poses of the human body that “trigger” the production of dopamine: straight back, arms raised up, head held high. The production of this hormone contributes to better memorization of material and information.

One minute of this exercise before negotiations will make you feel much more confident.

4. To develop “motivation”, do the following right now

Write down ten things you enjoy doing. Then reformulate them so that only verbs remain. Find exactly the verb that the best way will convey this or that activity.

Using these verbs, create a plan for the month. And during this month you will need to live ten days under the motto of this word. Travel or laugh, taste and learn new things, jump or count – there are many options.

For example, with the verb "tasting" as the motto, you could head to a special restaurant or wine boutique - or maybe throw a party at home. This can also become a concept for presenting your company’s products and services.

Just live each of these days with 200% of those ten words-actions that truly constitute your essence of growth - what you can give to the world.

When performing such exercises, you will definitely move closer to your true goals than in the last few years, because you will be engaged in the most important task of a successful businessman or leader - the implementation of the “creator’s strategy.”

// Questions of psychology. – 2006. – No. 3. – P. 78–86.

The definitions and structure of emotional intelligence within various scientific approaches to study this phenomenon; scientific and popular approaches to the definition and development of emotional intelligence are compared; the relevance of its study and development is substantiated.

Key words: emotional intelligence (EI), emotionality quotient (EQ), emotional competence.

The problem of human emotional culture has remained relevant throughout the history of human society. Even in the Bible, in the Book of Proverbs, we find examples of the emotional wisdom of humanity: “A fool immediately expresses his anger, but a prudent man hides his insults” (12:15); “Some idle talkers wound as with a sword, but the tongue of the wise heals” (12:18); “A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up” (15:1); “He who is long-suffering is better than the brave, and he who controls himself is better than the conqueror of a city” (16:32). Ecclesiastes teaches: “Mourning is better than laughter; because with a sad face the heart becomes better” (7:3).

Modern philosophers, following the thinkers of antiquity, emphasize the relevance of the problem of developing emotional competence - a person’s openness to his emotional experiences, linking its capabilities with the harmonious interaction of the heart and mind, affect and intellect.

To confirm this, let us quote a statement from Osho (Rajnish) that is relevant to the topic of our study: “In order to transform the intellect into the mind, it is absolutely necessary to first open your heart... The mind is the intellect attuned to your heart.”

In Russian psychology, the idea of ​​the unity of affect and intellect was reflected in the works of L.S. Vygotsky, S.L. Rubinshteina, A.N. Leontyev. L.S. Vygotsky came to the conclusion about the existence of a dynamic semantic system, which represents the unity of affective and intellectual processes: “As is known, the separation of the intellectual side of our consciousness from its affective, volitional side is one of the main and fundamental defects of all traditional psychology. In this case, thinking inevitably turns into an autonomous flow of self-thinking thoughts; it is divorced from the fullness of living life...” The unity of affect and intellect, according to the classic of psychology, is revealed, firstly, in the interrelation and mutual influence of these aspects of the psyche at all stages of development, and secondly, in the fact that this connection is dynamic, and each stage in the development of thinking corresponds to its own stage in the development of affect. S.L. Rubinstein, developing the ideas of L.S. Vygotsky, noted that thinking in itself is a unity of the emotional and rational.

However, the intended L.S. Vygotsky’s approaches to understanding the unity of affect and intelligence in the process of human development have not yet received proper development. This can be confirmed by the words of D.B. Elkonin that until now a significant drawback in considering mental development the child is the gap between the processes of mental development and personality development (including emotional).

In modern society, the problem of competence in understanding and expressing emotions is quite acute, since the cult of a rational attitude to life is artificially implanted in it, embodied in the image of a certain standard - an inflexible and seemingly emotionless superman. At the same time, K.D. Ushinsky, emphasizing the social meaning of emotions, noted that a society that cares about the education of the mind makes a big mistake, because a person is more human in how he feels than in how he thinks. Indeed, the cult of rationality and high educational qualifications do not directly ensure a humanistic worldview and emotional culture of a person.

According to E.L. Yakovleva, awareness of one’s own individuality is nothing more than awareness of one’s own emotional reactions and states indicating an individual attitude to what is happening.

It is known that a ban on emotions leads to their displacement from consciousness; in turn, the impossibility of psychological processing of emotions contributes to the growth of their physiological component. In modern civilized society, the number of people suffering from neuroses is constantly growing. Emotional problems manifest themselves with particular strength and clarity in people with a reduced level of self-control. Having escaped the control of consciousness, emotions interfere with the implementation of intentions, disrupt interpersonal relationships, prevent the proper fulfillment of work and family responsibilities, make it difficult to rest and worsen health.

Solving the problem of emotional and psychosomatic disorders could be facilitated by targeted work on the development of emotional wisdom, that ability that in modern foreign and domestic research is called emotional intelligence (EI).

Definition of Emotional Intelligence

Critics of the concept of emotional intelligence cite the following arguments to substantiate their position. Firstly, "intelligence" in in this case is an inappropriate, misleading metaphor, which, for a more accurate expression of the essence of the phenomenon under discussion, should be replaced by the term “competence”; secondly, intelligence is defined as ability, and “no unique abilities associated with emotions does not exist”; thirdly, in ideas about emotional intelligence, emotions are replaced by intelligence.

In fact, the attentive reader may wonder: isn’t the term “emotional intelligence” controversial? This is so if, according to a certain tradition of Western thought, emotions are represented as interferences that are so disorganizing and destructive of mental activity that they need to be controlled.

In the 1st century BC. Publius Sirus said: “Control your emotions, otherwise your emotions will control you.”

Much later, K. Jung defined emotions as strong anxiety that covers the individual as a whole. Modern proponents of this approach describe emotions as a spontaneous reaction, mainly internal, resulting from disturbances in affective regulation. They view emotions in pure form as a phenomenon caused by a complete loss of intellectual control and containing no trace of conscious purpose. Within the framework of this approach, R.S. Woodworth suggested that IQ scales should include tests that demonstrate that a person does not show fear, anger, aversion, or curiosity about the things that arouse these emotions in a child.

Apparently, in accordance with this tradition in Russian psychology, emotional intelligence is sometimes understood as a certain defective component of the thought process, reducing the objectivity of cognition and characterized by “rigidity, inertia.” Often, domestic researchers limit themselves only to stating the presence this concept(), without defining it, without clearly identifying its structural components, which may be due to both the semantic ambiguity of the concept and the ensuing problems of operationalizing emotional intelligence.

In contrast to the point of view stated above, in a number of modern foreign and domestic theories, emotion is considered as a special type of knowledge. Psychologists belonging to this school view emotions as an ordered response that focuses cognitive activity and subsequent actions for the purpose of adaptation. So, R.U. Leeper proposed that emotions are the primary motivating factors because emotional processes enable activity to be initiated, maintained, and controlled. Indeed, the word "emotion" comes from the Latin verb emovare, which means "to move."

Emotion is a means by which the body and mind interact, they are constantly changing and “moving”: e-motion (e-motion). So, if we are fully functional and prosperous, emotions are positive; if not, they “move” to the negative pole.

J. Mayer and P. Salovey define emotions as ordered reactions that cross the boundaries of many psychological subsystems, including physiological, cognitive, motivational, and empirical (related to experience). These are adaptive responses that can potentially transform personal and social interactions into enriching experiences.

The most common definition of intelligence is that of D. Wechsler: intelligence is a set of abilities, or the global ability of an individual to act purposefully, think rationally and communicate effectively with the environment. According to J. Mayer, such a definition is so broad that it tends to limit the concept.

According to H. Gardner's ideas about multiple intelligences, this mental phenomenon includes a wide range of abilities. The model of intelligence structures the organization of this space. H. Gardner's model includes seven main subtypes (forms) of intelligence, among which, along with traditional verbal and logical-mathematical, there are spatial, musical, bodily-kinesthetic, interpersonal and intrapersonal intelligence. Interpersonal intelligence, in turn, involves the ability to observe the feelings of others and use this knowledge to predict their behavior. One aspect of personal intelligence is also related to feelings and is very close to what J. Mayer, P. Salovey and D. Caruso call emotional intelligence.

One of the types of intelligence identified by H. Gardner is social intelligence, defined as the ability to understand and manage people. Research has found that social intelligence can be separated from general academic ability.

Emotional intelligence is viewed as a substructure of social intelligence that involves the ability to observe one's own and other people's emotions, differentiate between them, and use this information to guide thinking and action.

So, emotional intelligence does not contain general ideas about oneself and assessment of others. It focuses on understanding and using one's own and others' emotional states to solve problems and regulate behavior.
In accordance with the approaches described above to understanding emotions (a special type of knowledge) and intelligence (a set of interrelated mental abilities) the concept of “emotional intelligence” is defined as:
the ability to act with the internal environment of one's feelings and desires;
the ability to understand personality relationships, represented in emotions, and manage the emotional sphere on the basis of intellectual analysis and synthesis;
the ability to effectively control emotions and use them to improve thinking;
a set of emotional, personal and social abilities that influence the overall ability to cope effectively with demands and pressures environment;
emotional and intellectual activity.

Summarizing these definitions, it can be noted that individuals with a high level of development of emotional intelligence have pronounced abilities to understand their own emotions and the emotions of other people, as well as to manage the emotional sphere, which leads to higher adaptability and effectiveness in communication.

Unlike abstract and concrete intelligence, which reflect the patterns of the external world, emotional intelligence reflects inner world and its connection with personal behavior and interaction with reality. The end product of emotional intelligence is decision-making based on the reflection and comprehension of emotions, which are a differentiated assessment of events that have personal meaning. Ultimately, emotional intelligence underlies emotional self-regulation.

Structure of emotional intelligence

The first publications on the problem of emotional intelligence belong to J. Mayer and P. Salovey, who proposed the first definition of emotional intelligence and showed that it can be measured. D. Goleman’s book “Emotional Intelligence,” which is very popular in the West, was published only in 1995. According to the ideas of the authors of the original concept of emotional intelligence, J. Mayer, P. Salovey, D. Caruso, emotional intelligence is a group of mental abilities that contribute to awareness and understanding own emotions and the emotions of others.

The structure of emotional intelligence proposed by J. Mayer, P. Salovey, D. Caruso in 1990 is as follows:

Assessing and expressing emotions: your own (verbal or non-verbal); other people (non-verbal perception or empathy).

Regulation of emotions: own; other people.
Using emotions: flexible planning; creative thinking; switching attention; motivation.

This structure was subsequently refined. It currently includes four components, which together describe four areas of emotional intelligence, namely the abilities:
accurately distinguish between your own emotions and the emotions of other people;
use emotions to increase the efficiency of mental activity;
understand the meaning of emotions;
manage emotions.

According to the improved model, emotional intelligence includes the following mental abilities:
conscious regulation of emotions;
understanding (comprehension) of emotions;
assimilation of emotions in thinking;
discrimination and expression of emotions.

Let us briefly characterize the structural components of emotional intelligence and their significance in the process of interpersonal interaction.

1. Conscious regulation of emotions. Emotions cannot be controlled directly, but this can be done indirectly: through an object, a need, a sign. The initial moment of managing a feeling is the splitting of a monolithic undifferentiated affect (I-feeling) into a subject and his feeling; more precisely, this is the isolating of a feeling as a separate object, and not a property of the external world (“I experience fear, pleasure,” and not “The world”). scary or pleasant").

The next stage of emotion management is to expand or limit the flow of emotional information, for example, using controlling thoughts.

Thus, a defensive strategy that limits emotional experience is accompanied by thoughts like “Don’t think about it,” “This doesn’t deserve my attention,” “I don’t react,” etc. On the contrary, thoughts such as “Find out more about this”, “Open yourself to this feeling” and others indicate an openness of consciousness to the flow of emotional experiences.

It has been established that in this case people are able to empathize with others, understand the depth of their feelings, i.e. show empathy to a greater extent than when the mechanism for managing emotional experience acts in the direction of limiting it.

Although many aspects of mood regulation occur automatically, certain meta-experiences of emotional states are conscious and open to exploration. Meta-experience of experiencing moods, which has developed as a result of generalization of many situations (which moods are typical, which are not; which moods are understandable, which are not), provides a person with data for constructing an implicit theory about those situations that can cause certain moods. J. Mayer leads next example: If during dancing, for example, a pleasant mood arose, then in the future dancing with someone can cause the same mood again.

You can regulate your mood by associating yourself with certain people. Thus, by identifying with people who have achieved success in an area that is meaningful to us, we can manage negative emotional states such as envy. A person strives to maintain positive moods and avoid negative ones, “reinforced” by information that promotes positive ideas about oneself. In addition, an individual may actively act to benefit others in order to cope with his own negative emotions. This "help in a negative emotional state" is seen as a motive for altruistic behavior. The meta-experience of mood may influence the selection of emotional states through a positive increase in overall internal experience.

Constant suppression of emotions is known to contribute to the occurrence of various diseases, but uncontrolled emotional expression complicates interpersonal communication. In addition, the constraint strategy likely plays an important role in creating the necessary motivation and curbing impulsive behavior.

The degree of emotional expressiveness affects the quality of interpersonal relationships. Thus, excessive restraint leads to the fact that a person is perceived as cold, indifferent, arrogant, which causes surprise or hostility among others.

Understanding emotions.

The experience of emotion and its naming (definition) are different phenomena that can be empirically separated, which has important implications for the subject's emotional experience and for his behavior. Naming (defining) an emotion is seen as a result constructive processes, which transform perceptual experiences into internal experience, modifying them. In this regard, three main functions of naming emotions can be cited: consolidation of experience, interpersonal communication, emotional expression.

The ability to express emotions verbally depends in part on the ability to talk about them clearly. In this regard, emotion recognition is problematic for individuals with severe alexithemia. The term alexithemia (“feeling without words”) was coined by the American psychiatrist R.E. Sifneosom.

Several psychological explanations for alexithemia have been proposed. These include possible blocking of impulses between the left and right hemispheres in the corpus callosum or disruption of the connection between the functioning of the limbic system and higher cortical activity. The essential characteristics of alexithemia are: difficulty in identifying and describing one's feelings; inability to differentiate feelings and bodily sensations; lack of imagination, rigidity and concreteness.

An interesting example of alexithemia was discovered by K. Goldberg in Shakespeare's Hamlet. Main character talks a lot, argues with himself. However, in contrast to the purpose of language as a carrier of meanings expressing a person’s intentions, desires and feelings, Hamlet’s statements do not lead to better mutual understanding and harmonization of relationships. Words essentially replace interpersonal relationships for him. The reason for the inability to have close emotional relationships (or fear of them), according to the author, is that in early childhood father and son did not have the opportunity or desire to openly express their feelings and needs through meaningful words. The feeling of shame in front of the father was later transferred to relationships with others.

Discrimination and expression of emotions.

Distinguishing emotions is related to the possibilities of their expression. From an evolutionary point of view, it is important that people have the ability to differentiate not only their own emotions, but also the emotions of others. Such perceptual abilities ensured successful interpersonal cooperation.

Mastering the language of emotions requires mastering the forms of their expression generally accepted in a given culture, as well as understanding the individual manifestations of emotions in the people with whom one lives and works. However, recognizing emotions is more difficult than expressing them. Distinguishing emotions is also associated with the level of development of empathy. According to K. Rogers, the empathic way of communicating with another person has several facets. It implies entering the personal world of another and being “at home” in it, constant sensitivity to the changing experiences of the communication partner. This is similar to a situation when a person, as it were, temporarily lives another life, delicately dwells in it without evaluation and condemnation, perceiving what the other is barely aware of. However, there are no attempts to reveal unconscious feelings, since they can be traumatic. To be empathetic means to be responsible, active, strong and at the same time subtle and sensitive.

Empathy researchers note its dependence on auxiliary abilities similar to the assessment and expression of emotions: the ability to understand another person's point of view, accurately identify the emotions of others, experience certain appropriate emotions in response to the emotions of others, communicate or act on the basis of this internal experience.

You can select following reasons difficulties in understanding individual differences in the emotions of other people: a focus on one’s own personality, leading to an inability to notice and correctly assess the emotional state of other people; feeling of superiority; a feeling of anxiety associated with the emotions of other people or one’s own (anxiety prompts you to avoid everything that could cause emotions); any benefit from not understanding other people's emotions.

J. Reikowski also cites the following reasons for difficulties in expressing emotions: lack of assimilation of socially accepted forms of expressing emotions; fear of revealing one's own feelings, associated with fear of loss of self-control or fear of censure from others (fear of being compromised, rejected or ridiculed); innate factors (although the learning process plays a decisive role); mastering the norms of behavior prevailing in the family and immediate environment.

The assimilation of emotions in thinking (the use of emotions to improve the quality of mental activity), the understanding of the unity of the rational and the emotional is confirmed by data from clinical experiments, according to which the implementation of an effective or satisfactory decision-making process is impossible if the thought is devoid of emotional reinforcement. We can assume the presence in the structure of emotional intelligence of emotions that motivate cognitive activity, which is associated with the emotional sphere, more precisely, with the recognition, expression, and understanding of emotions.

Emotional intelligence is not fundamentally different from what is measured by IQ. This is also a mental ability, with the help of which, however, a special type of information is processed - emotional information. However, IQ and EQ are two different factors of life achievement. It has been observed that people with high IQ, but low EQ, often do not fully use their potential and lose their chances of success because they think, interact and communicate unconstructively.

Emotional intelligence as a phenomenon of scientific and popular psychology

Within the framework of ideas about emotional intelligence, there is a popular concept (D. Goleman and others), according to which emotional intelligence is defined as a list of different, sometimes very distant from each other personal characteristics, including motivation, optimism, perseverance, cordiality and others. J. Mayer refers to such broad definitions of emotional intelligence as a “mixed model” because it combines various personality characteristics together. He notes that the popular model of emotional intelligence includes the assumption that it is possible to predict the most important life achievements using lists of qualities that, firstly, vary significantly among different authors, and secondly, are sometimes very far from the concepts of “emotions” and "intelligence". Such models of emotional intelligence are used as attractive new advertisements for “old-fashioned” personality research. Based on a broad interpretation of the concept in question, commercial EI development programs are proposed that supposedly promote the advancement of their participants towards happiness, satisfaction and energy.

Emotional intelligence is touted as the absolute key to success in all areas of life: school, work, relationships. However, according to J. Mayer, EI may account for only 1–10% (other sources estimate 2–25%) of major life patterns and outcomes. For example, emotional intelligence correlates negatively with problem behaviors such as aggression and drug use, with high levels of trait anxiety in adolescents, and positively with organizational skills. It is only one of many personality factors, and although it often acts as a positive factor, it can in some aspects be seen as negative. For example, traditional views of emotional intelligence can take on manipulative connotations if they overlook the fact that analyzing one's own emotions or the emotions of others allows one to regulate behavior in a more prosocial style.

Contrary to the common view that a person with a high level of emotional intelligence is always in control of his own emotions, J. Mayer argues that EI does not depend on the emotional state. A person with a high level of emotional intelligence may be sad or depressed because he has reasons for this, and such a person will not necessarily “get out” of a negative emotional state quickly or easily. People will always be sad and depressed - this is part of human existence.

The only point on which popular and scientific concepts of emotional intelligence agree is that emotional intelligence broadens the concept of what it means to be smart. This means that in the heads of those people who are usually classified as “romantic”, “very sensitive”, “bleeding hearts”, serious information processing takes place.

Emotional intelligence is a stable mental ability, part of a broad class of mental abilities; in particular, emotional intelligence can be considered a substructure of social intelligence. As a mental ability, it is also part of a larger group of personality traits. It is one of many personality factors that are more positive than negative for interpersonal interaction.

The structure of emotional intelligence includes the ability to consciously regulate emotions; understanding (comprehension) of emotions; assimilation of emotions into thinking; discrimination and expression of emotions.
Currently, there is a need for further research into the phenomenon of emotional intelligence, its structure, and ways of its development, which will open up a real opportunity to optimize relationships through a deeper awareness of the emotional processes and states that arise between people in the process of interpersonal interaction. The development of emotional intelligence can be considered as a significant factor in increasing the psychological culture of society as a whole.

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