What makes girls liberated? Sexual liberation: an advantage or a disadvantage? Provide a suitable environment
The other extreme is a woman’s excessive emancipation and assertiveness and her frivolous attitude towards casual relationships.
In the second half of the last century, the sexual revolution swept across the world. One of its most noticeable consequences was that women stopped hiding their sexuality. If earlier a representative of the fair sex could not take the initiative in a relationship with a man, then in the last third of the twentieth century this became possible.
Women realized that there is nothing shameful in the fact that the physical side of relationships is no less important for them than for men, and they stopped keeping silent about their desires. I wonder how men feel about sexually liberated girls and women and whether they approve of such behavior?
Women without complexes
On the one hand, many men in some cases are still timid and may not be sure whether they should take the initiative to meet the girl they like. Under such circumstances, a liberated representative of the fairer sex, who can take the first step on her own and in the future is able to be more proactive than a young man, including in matters of sexual relations, will cause him nothing but approval and admiration.
On the other hand, it is important that a woman’s emancipation is the result of her conscious choice, and not the desire to be fashionable and modern. Sometimes a girl starts in order to be like someone; unfortunately, in the end, choosing a model of behavior that does not come from the heart brings her nothing but disappointment. The same can be said about those women who, having become disillusioned with men, try to replace real feelings with non-binding sexual relationships. Behind the apparent self-confidence bordering on bravado, they hide the fear that someone will hurt them, and even thoughts that they are unworthy of love.
Women with a past
As for men's opinions about sexually liberated women who see nothing wrong with taking the initiative in relationships, they can be very different. No matter how modern and free a young man considers himself to be, in the overwhelming majority of cases, a woman’s emancipation is for him a logical continuation of her rich sexual experience.
With a man, he may simply lose all interest in her, because the most important stage of the relationship - the conquest of the Beautiful Lady by a valiant knight - has been missed. A girl who is easy on relationships should not be surprised that many men will perceive her solely as a sex object. Thus, an emancipated, sexually liberated girl is convenient for men, but it is unlikely that most of them would like to see her as their wife and mother of their children.
- 8 months without sex? How are you not crazy yet? - Yes, somehow I’m already used to it... - You definitely need to find someone for sex, abstaining is harmful. - No, I can’t do that, I need to fall in love. - Why are you such a prude!? This dialogue took place in one of the Moscow coffee shops, and in a sense it is indicative, since it has become typical. It is fashionable today to be uninhibited and uninhibited.
It’s fashionable to talk about how wonderfully I had a time at a resort with a muscular Turk, rocked it with my husband and his friend, and call everyone who doesn’t like anal sex prudes.
And the point is not whether all of the listed things are good or bad in themselves (each of these questions must be decided for oneself), but that they have become almost mandatory for an advanced resident of the metropolis.
Modesty and abstinence, on the contrary, become considered shortcomings, and the lack of regular sex is generally a problem that must be dealt with by any means.
the site tried to find out where the fashion for liberation comes from, whether men like it and whether women themselves need it.
Is liberation the result of emancipation?
Sexual liberation: is the West to blame?
Sexual liberation
When it comes to sexual liberation and free love, It is customary to blame the West first for everything. Allegedly in Soviet times people were protected from the “corruptive influence of the West,” and now the Americans are imposing their culture on us, ruining the country and destroying the institution of the family.
But if you think about it a little, everything is somewhat more complicated, and in general the idea that certain structures deliberately instill certain values looks a little absurd. If only because everything can be explained without it.
The 90s were an era when Western culture poured into us, and we, hungry for freedom, scooped up handfuls of it and took everything indiscriminately, without analyzing whether it was good or bad.
But the point is not only what came to us from the West, but what left with the collapse of the USSR. The 90s were also a time of loss of direction and reassessment of values.
Previously, values such as education, erudition, intelligence, and determination were taken for granted, and these were the main qualities in a person. All this faded into the background, and the main dignity of a person became external, status.
Along with values, a person’s attitude towards himself has also changed - on the one hand, a person has become a person, and on the other, a person with certain, roughly speaking, commodity characteristics.
And sexuality and emancipation are a kind of commercial qualities. By the way, a popular name for older women - illiquid - from the same opera. An illiquid product that has lost its main commercial quality - sexuality.
Among other things, something else happened in the 90s - people had the freedom to think, choose and live as they wanted, and not as the party said, but the habit of living under dictation remained, only now the media became the main “dictator”.
What happened then can be described by the popular champagne metaphor - the cork popped, the foam began to flow, but sooner or later the foam will go away, and with it the excess will go away, and this is already happening.
And if we talk about the influence of Western culture, then, yes, of course, the fashion for emancipation and free love came from there, but another trend also comes from there.
For example, in the same USA, in response to the cult of promiscuity (both sexual and moral), the straight-age movement was born, preaching the rejection of everything that destroys a person, that is, drugs, alcohol, and promiscuous relationships.
It also reached us, but, like the fashion for liberation, with a delay. Time will tell what the next generation will be like, but we make our choice today, and this choice must be conscious.
Male opinion
Sexual liberation: what is it for?
Sexual liberation
If we dig even deeper, then sexual liberation in general, and not just in Russia, is a consequence of much more complex processes: in particular, this is one of the results emancipation, although at first glance this connection may not be entirely obvious.
Equality brought us not only virtually equal rights and opportunities, but also led to the fact that both men and women began to have, to some extent, equal requirements when it comes to success in life.
And in this context, emancipation is something like a way to demonstrate one’s independence, one’s confidence and, to some extent, perhaps even masculinity.
Masculinity, of course, does not mean not shaving your armpits and speaking in a deep voice, but in being a conqueror and huntress sexually on an equal basis with a man.
Of course, the patriarchal model still remains dominant, but is no longer the only acceptable one. The woman, having ceased to be a man’s helper, as prescribed by the same Bible, became his rival.
And emancipation is a demonstration that she no longer depends on the opinion of a man, she does not save herself for her only conqueror, because she herself is a conqueror.
Like a man, she has the right to desire sexual satisfaction and choose partners without becoming an outcast and without standing in opposition to society. And that's okay.
Sometimes, however, the reality is much more banal, and behind the emancipation lies not independence and confidence, but, on the contrary, uncertainty and fear. This happens in both young girls and fully grown women.
The reason may be, for example, a negative relationship experience, which led to the woman subconsciously avoiding serious feelings and even believing that she is unworthy of them.
The fear of being rejected is also mixed in, so a woman, when starting contact with a man, instead of an emotional challenge, throws a sexual challenge, the answer to which is much easier to obtain.
And such emancipation is unnatural and wrong. And the willingness to go to any lengths in sex, dictated by a painful desire to please everyone, is also wrong.
Sexual liberation: men's opinion
Sexual liberation
As for the opinion of men, you can quote studies as much as you like proving that men like liberated women, but if we talk about serious relationships, then in most cases (not always, because there are no rules without exceptions) they will prefer a more modest girl, the emancipation of which is limited to the boundaries of the marital bed.
It's corny, but nothing has changed. As an object of sexual desire, a liberated, independent woman will certainly be successful. But as a potential wife and mother - hardly. But let’s listen to the opinions of the men themselves on this matter:
Dima, 29 years old:
“I associate emancipation with the rich sexual experience. For some, this may be great, but to realize that you are already God knows how many in a row - perhaps not even the 101st anymore - is somehow not great. I'm not looking virgin, but I want to know that my girlfriend takes sex seriously and is picky in her relationships.”
Ivan, 32 years old:
“I have a friend, she’s not a prostitute, not a whore, she just doesn’t like to be in a long-term relationship. She counted 4 years ago - she counted more than 60 partners, and that’s just sex, and twice as many more
“15-20 years ago I would have said that liberation is great. Many young guys in their 20s prefer older women (over 30) because of their experience and liberation - they agree to sex faster, they are more capable: both giving you a blowjob and anal sex.
But at some point you get fed up with this and want a deeper relationship, so that for her you are not just another one, but the one and only - you won’t feel this with experienced and super-duper-liberated people.
When a girl takes sex seriously, she can give so much more. In general, I agree - freedom is in fashion, and for men, to be honest... it’s convenient.”
Yes, it’s convenient for men, but is it convenient for the woman herself? Do you need to be accessible to everyone or, as they call it now, open and liberated?
The meaning of a woman’s life has long ceased to be limited to being only a wife and mother. She may or may not be a wife and mother. She can act like a man, work like a man, and be the hunter and conqueror in a relationship.
The choice is the woman's, and that's wonderful. All that remains is to learn how to choose correctly and, most importantly, independently, and not for the sake of fashion or public opinion.
There is, of course, another facet of emancipation - emancipation in relationships with one man - for example, with a husband.
But even in this case, the answer is ambiguous. After all, perhaps what your man loves about you is modesty and the fact that you need to be persuaded to experiment and conquered.
Don't force yourself by trying to be different from who you are. Be free in your choice, because this freedom is a manifestation of emancipation: to decide what you need.
I don't know under what circumstances you were going to do this. Perhaps you have already invited her to visit. Or maybe you just want to know how to loosen up a girl on a date so that it goes off with a bang.
If you consider any form of communication with her as a prelude to sex, then you need to act in such a way that she becomes more attracted to you. This emotion will dominate in her, and then any tightness and fears will simply evaporate.
Let's start with platitudes...
Be the bad guy
Have you ever wondered why good people don't succeed?
It's simple: public opinion(including good guys) prevents girls from fully revealing themselves. Although by nature they are very depraved and liberated creatures.
To begin to feel liberated, they need someone who is not afraid to accept them as such. And, of course, this someone - bad guy, who himself is ready to “go all out,” and even more so, will not condemn her for any actions.
It may seem strange to you, but this really has a big impact on your communication with her. It is important for her to know that her liberated behavior will be approved (which is almost impossible to achieve by being a good guy).
Jokes, jokes, relaxed and slightly arrogant behavior... find the rest of the “parameters” and start using it yourself.
There must be humor!
He will help you, even if you have a hard time sticking to the bad guy image.
Just learn to make interesting jokes. If you don’t have enough experience, borrow other people’s jokes.
Start of the meeting
How you start your date has a huge impact on your date.
Any hitch on initial stage may mark the beginning of the end.
There is a huge difference between the two situations:
- You immediately begin to have an active conversation, joke, take her hand, lead her to a certain place and, in general, create some kind of action.
- You both feel shy, start walking slowly somewhere, and you ask how she is doing, or how her day went.
The first will make her more relaxed within 30 minutes. Second, it will “kill” all your attempts to make her your girlfriend.
About the 30 minute rule
If it seems to you that you don’t know how to liberate this particular girl, then it just seems like it to you.
Remember: regardless of the meeting place (street, cafe, your home), she needs some time to get used to it (20-40 minutes).
Of course, this does not mean that you now also have to remain silent for this half hour and wait for her to loosen up. Be proactive from the very beginning of the meeting and don’t expect immediate results.
Alcohol in the right “sauce”
Alcohol liberates everyone. But if you simply offer a drink, she will immediately understand what exactly you want from her.
Therefore there must be a pretext. This could be your or her success in recent affairs, which cannot be ignored, “otherwise it will not happen again.”
Or an offer to try some unusual cocktail. Ideally: it will be a cocktail that few people have tried, and which has some kind of backstory (it will definitely need to be told).
If you have not yet managed to bring her to your home, then plan your route in such a way that when passing by some bar (preferably a very civilized bar, and not a simple “pub”), you can say: “By the way, there is ..." and offer to drop by.
Casual touches
Openly touching a tight girl can easily provoke even greater tightness. A switch turns on in her head, hinting to her about what exactly you want from her. Moreover, this happens even when you have already had a couple of dates.
Therefore, it is better to use “random” touches.
At first you simply lead her across the road, holding her hand. Then, sitting next to you, you touch your shoulder. Every time your hand moves in a certain direction, it may accidentally touch a girl for a very short time.
Then connect “quick” touches – literally for a couple of seconds. Here you can already allow yourself to touch her more openly and not accidentally, but remember that they must be “quick” (for 2-5 seconds). Again, this rightly exists to avoid provoking a backlash.
The more such short touches you make, the faster you will create the “correct” state in her.
If she is not in the mood, or everything should be in place!
If she is in a bad mood, and at the same time, you have not had sex yet, then your attempts to create romance can ruin everything. She will begin to feel some kind of obligation, and this will make her constrained.
The best option is adjustment.
The point is that first you adapt to her mood, talk to her on suitable topics, and little by little make the communication more lively and fun. Ideal: if you manage to completely change her condition in this way.
This will give better results than inappropriate romance.
In general, everything is decided by the experience of communicating with the opposite sex. I sincerely hope that you will develop the necessary skills in yourself as soon as possible, and will not think every time how to liberate a girl.
Interestingly, guys who are moderately experienced in communication rarely encounter this problem. When they come on a date, they rarely encounter constraint on the part of the girl. Which means great value has a history of communication (i.e. the acquaintance itself and communication over the phone). Udeli increased attention how exactly you meet girls and how you communicate on the phone.
Perhaps a little foreplay in the form of a fun telephone conversation will help you make your date more lively and comfortable.
Good afternoon, dear BroDude editors! I haven't been with you very long and may not be in the age group for which most of your articles are written (I'm only 20), but I always try to learn maximum benefit from what you write. And for the most part I succeed, for which special thanks. The only thing that interests me, and which I could not find: what to do if your girlfriend is too complex and too conservative when it comes to sex? If I describe the whole situation in 2 words, then I am her first, sex for her is the satisfaction of needs and nothing more. Accordingly, from the very beginning it was reduced only to simple manipulations, which were already pretty boring. She doesn’t pay attention to what I want, while I do absolutely everything that she likes (not because she dominates and demands, no, just because I myself like to give her pleasure). After the time that we have been together, I simply lose the desire to try and have sex with her, and this is not cool. I would like to hear advice to bring this “sexual inequality” and, accordingly, our relationships into balance. Thank you in advance!
Answer
Hello my friend. Don't worry, people inherit thrones and rule countries at age 20, so age most often only tells you how many years ago a person's parents had unsafe sex. If you are truly trying to get the maximum benefit from our articles, then you are morally older than your peers. We have nothing to do with these carbonated pussies, but we’ll drive you crazy. Just a joke, of course. We are open to everyone who remembers such programs as “Despite the Records” and “Finest Hour”.
Well, now to your problem. Although what kind of problem there is, frankly speaking, is a trifle. It is clear that due to your youth and inexperience, you are a little confused. This is normal, at 20 we ourselves thought that cunnilingus was a surname, metrosexuals have sex in the subway, and... In fact, everywhere, and especially in intimate life, experience is welcome. I remember the classic poems:
Ha-ha yes hee-hee, but I did everything badly -
No taste, no tact, no technique.
It would be better if I read books, you fool,
Poems and sex textbooks!
But no one reads books, and thank God, they are taking readers away from us. In general, remember yourself at the beginning of your genitourinary career, when you timidly invaded other people’s caves, recalling the dashing movements from your favorite porn. You had a lot of agility, but your execution let you down - you probably groaned like the dwarf from Snow White. It seems to us all that we are, in general, nothing, and they may tell us that we have proven ourselves with the best side. But more often they say this so as not to offend, especially since the general impression remained strictly positive, but some of our decisions and movements caused confusion, we simply did not notice this in the heat of love. And sometimes you just make the same progressive movements - no imagination, no tact, no bold decisions. We line up behind us and monotonously chase our beloved, snoring characteristically. And he seems to be experienced, he seems to have sex as long as you live, he seems to have as many bed battles behind him as ace pilots have flown, but still he didn’t surprise her. So this is about an experienced person, let alone beginners. However, it is much worse when a person has not learned anything during his sexual experience other than monotonous progressive movements in one direction. His sex can be shown instead of " Good night, kids” so that children fall asleep faster. And why? Because they didn’t teach the person, and the partners, instead of pointing out mistakes, either tolerated it or broke off the relationship. You have approximately the same situation. Your woman has just started her creative path in great sex. She did not have an innate talent for this discipline, and therefore she has complexes, not fully understanding what sex is. He only knows what it is like to be alone loving person penetrates into another, and that’s it. Therefore, try to increase the frequency of your coitus. The more of it there is, the more she will begin to get involved in this matter. A girl needs to be taught to try different things, to say how sexy she is, how you want her, so that she can relax. Then he will love this business so much that you won’t be able to pull it away by the ears. Everyone is inept at first, but you, as a more experienced partner, must take the initiative. In addition, sexual preference is a thing that is determined in a practical way. And what can be determined by partners who have not tried anything other than missionary?
In general, it’s worth talking to her frankly. Ask what's wrong, maybe it's all about you and not about her. Or she’s just simply, and no matter how hard you try, no matter how much you sweat, it won’t do any good. And then you decide for yourself whether to stay with such a woman or not. Or maybe you upset her with your ineptitude. So what if she is inexperienced, maybe she has innate talent? The main thing is, don’t be shy to say what you want. Just not like this: “Today I will put you on your belly, tie you up, fuck you, and you will scream and say what you like.” Be gentle. The more you offer new positions and solutions, the faster she will begin to take the initiative. In the meantime, don’t expect it, because there is Golden Rule: how fewer people copulate, the more embarrassed they are about sex. Loosen up young lady, you have the same mission as the shepherd - to teach, accustom and use for personal purposes. As psychoanalysts who charge 100 euros for a session like to say: “You need to open up,” suddenly it turns out that she likes hardcore, BDSM, and only screams, convulsions and spasms will lead her to orgasm and force her to devote 150% to the process. But this does not mean that you need to take a whip and go to her - if I had been beaten and raped during the 3rd sexual intercourse, I would hardly have continued to do this. If you don’t have enough ideas for sex, then turn to porn for help. They will tell you everything, show you everything, and surprise you. unusual solutions and resourcefulness. By the way, perhaps watching low-quality videos together will liberate both of you, but this is not certain.
And most importantly, don’t make a mistake yourself. Try, work selflessly and zealously. And then your partner, seeing how you devote yourself to your work, will want to surprise and please.
In order for a man to be able to win people over, it is important to be able to liberate them. And in order to liberate a girl, you need to convince her of her own uniqueness and difference from others. How to liberate a girl? To do this, it is enough to follow a number of simple rules.
Get attention
You need first attract a girl's attention, concentrate it on your person. Think about what you say, don’t bombard your interlocutor with unrelated sentences. It’s better to speak, as they say, rarely, but accurately. Practice your speech style and gesture system in advance so that they are individual. This way you can stand out from the crowd of men.
Don't be smart
And in general, before starting a conversation with a girl, it’s better watch her for a while. Don’t be too smart, you’re not at a scientific symposium. Speak on topics that your interlocutor understands. At first it might be common topics, which the fairer sex likes to talk about (news, fashion, clothes), and then, when you get to know your interlocutor better, you will be able to communicate on other topics.
There are a lot of jokes... it happens
Show your sense of humor carefully, do not constantly tell jokes, even if they are super funny. Just communicate casually, sometimes make appropriate jokes, make the girl smile. If she doesn’t hesitate to smile or even laugh wildly when talking to you, it means she likes you.
Don't rush things
If a girl gives you hints that you can continue to get closer, do not fall for them. Most likely, the interlocutor is just testing you, and if she sees that you willingly respond to her hidden signals, she will obviously not relax, because she will think that you are not a serious person.
Talk in private
It’s always better to talk to a girl about something more or less serious in private. so that you are not disturbed by her friends or, accordingly, your friends. Yes, it will be more fun with them, but it’s unlikely that you wanted to laugh with the girl, you’re busy seducing her. During a conversation, do not try to be as close to her as possible; it is too early to violate personal space, as this will harm the girl’s process of emancipation.
Thus, to attract a girl to you, communicate casually, insert appropriate jokes from time to time. When she smiles in your presence, listening to you, it means that she definitely likes you. A where there is sympathy, emancipation is not far away, because for her you are already almost her own person. If this happens, you have a good chance of developing a friendly, romantic, and then serious relationship.