What to say to the director when leaving. Video: legal grounds and procedures for terminating an employment contract
Some tips on what not to say to your boss when you quit, from the authors of popular books on careers and marketing, Lynn Taylor and Dana Manciali. CPU provides an adapted translation of the article.
When a person plans to change jobs, he, as a rule, wants to tell his boss everything as it is, and leave the boring place by speaking out. “No matter how you feel about leaving the company, you shouldn’t burn bridges,” says Dana Manshiali. “What you say when you leave depends on whether the company will support you in the future.” Dana notes that people usually regret what they said when they submitted their resignation.
There are two scenarios according to which events most often develop. In the first case, the employee quits because he found another job - he wants to humiliate his superiors, “teach the company a good lesson,” and he throws mud at everything he can. Another situation: a person quits, but he has no other offers - then he feels like a victim and rushes to blame everyone around him for his problems.
When leaving a company, it is best to talk about positive aspects, for example, about the experience gained. “Try to use words that won’t leave a bad taste in the mouth of management, no matter how difficult it may be. It could always happen that you have to get a job in this place again,” says Manshiali.
Lynn Taylor advises taking your time and spending some time thinking about the conversation ahead. “Write down the positive aspects of working for the company. The boss will remember everything you say. Exude negativity into in this case has no practical meaning."
Here's a list of 17 things you shouldn't say when you quit.
1. "I'm leaving... today"
You should never leave a company without giving management enough time to think about the situation and find a new employee. "If you can offer your boss more than two weeks, it will have a positive impact on your reputation, even if the company doesn't need that much time," Taylor says.
2. “This is the worst organization I have ever worked for.”
To avoid hammering a few extra nails into your coffin, don't give the company negative ratings - this will only reduce your chances of returning if necessary. "There's nothing good about publicly humiliating a company," Dana says.
It's better to say, "I hope my skills will be more in demand elsewhere."
3. “You don’t know how to manage people.”
First of all, insults will get you nowhere. Secondly, the quality of management depends equally on superiors and subordinates, Manshiali notes.
Instead, you might say, “I think we were both tired of each other, so our relationship as manager and employee wasn't what it should have been.” However, it is best to avoid this topic in conversation altogether.
4. “Nobody likes working here.”
“Don’t try to play captain on a sinking ship. Even if what you say is true, your colleagues will not appreciate your outburst, since no one chose you to speak on their behalf,” says Taylor. “Even if they are going to jump ship, they can handle it on their own.”
5. “Other people are getting promotions, but I’m going nowhere, so I’m leaving.”
“It’s sad to hear something like that, because the person who says it doesn’t understand that his advancement career ladder has nothing to do with the success of his colleagues. This indicates a low level of self-awareness,” notes Dana.
6. “What we do does not meet generally accepted standards”
This will not add points to the person leaving, even if the criticism is constructive. “As soon as you say something like that, you're already seen as a traitor, so don't give management any reason to think that you might be an obstacle to them,” Lynn says.
7. “My work is paid too little” or “Salaries at this company are not competitive”
Don't reduce everything to money. “Statements of unsatisfactory wages, even if they are fair, will be perceived as attacks against the company, and will affect your recommendations and future career in general,” Taylor notes. “Think carefully about what you gain, or rather, lose, by openly criticizing the employer’s policies.”
Marciali agrees with Lynn: "You can't judge the competitiveness of your salary unless you've done statistically sound market research."
If you still want to mention salary, you can try: “I was lucky enough to find a position that will give me and my family a little respite financially.”
8. “I am concerned about the future of the company.”
“You just voice your concerns before you leave, and it’s like management gets hit in the head,” says Lynn Taylor. It is better not to share your doubts with your employer.
9. “He never let me realize myself, and she was always rude to me.”
Now is not the time to mention your relationships with colleagues, says Marziali. "Too late. Are you leaving. With such an approach to business, you will look pathetic and weak - so don’t do it. Talk only about yourself."
10. “I don’t get enough work” or “I’m always bored”
This statement only speaks of a lack of initiative, and an employee who makes such a statement forever marks himself in the eyes of his superiors as “unmotivated.” In this case, it is useless to shift the blame to the boss or employees - what happened was what happened. Best Tactics- speak briefly, professionally, thank you for the opportunities provided.
11. “I didn’t interfere in other people’s affairs and did my job - but my efforts were not rewarded.”
Salary and professional employment are the reward. Manshiali says that an employee who wants to attract the attention of his superiors and receive from management Thanksgiving letters or other incentives, should talk about it with the boss himself, and not wait for him to just be noticed. “Excellence in your work is not only about blind obedience to your superiors. Frankly, this strategy could backfire."
12. “I already told my colleagues about this, and now I’m telling you.”
No matter how strained an employee's relationship with management, you should always respect your boss's position and inform him of your plans to leave the company before sharing it with anyone else. “All you need is further support from management. You won't get it if you put your colleagues above management,” says Dana. Lynn advises discussing your decision with family and close friends outside of work, and then going straight to your boss.
13. “I have a great offer from a much cooler company.”
The last thing a former employer wants to hear in less than five minutes is how great the company the employee is leaving for is. “Don't name the organization you're going to or say anything about it other than why it's a better fit for you,” advises Taylor.
14. “I couldn’t find you, so I left a letter (message on the answering machine) saying that...”
When you quit, you should do everything possible to talk to your boss in person. Only after discussing the problem with your boss face to face can you write him a formal letter of resignation.
15. “Here’s what’s wrong with this job: …”
“Don't give unsolicited advice,” says Lynn, “it will look arrogant. Thank the employer for the training and opportunities provided.”
16. “I am ready (not ready) to listen to counter-offers or claims”
Firstly, it is unlikely that the employer will want to oppose anything. Secondly, there is no need to declare your desire or unwillingness to listen to your opponent before this has even been discussed.
17. “Good luck.” You're on a sinking ship"
This is one of the worst things that can slip through a quitter's mind, Manciali says. “Just wish the company well.”
Lynn Taylor notes that not saying any of the above when parting with your boss is quite difficult - dismissal, most often, is the culmination of months or even years of accumulated disappointment. However, it is still worth trying to avoid these phrases for the benefit of your future career.
Most people have changed jobs at least once in their lives for one reason or another. Some due to low salaries or poor relationships in the team, others found a more promising job with better conditions. But what to do in such a situation? How can you tell your manager about your dismissal with whom you have worked side by side for so long? How to tell the director such news without provoking aggression and leaving calmly on good terms? – All these questions will be answered.
Before announcing your departure from the organization, you need to think it through carefully. It is important not to burn bridges behind you. It is necessary to maintain friendly or at least human relations as much as possible. There is no need to do it on the sly, stunning the employer with the news, or to do it out of spite. Some still do just that, quit at the moment when the company needs them, leaving a ton of work behind them. It’s wrong to do this: you don’t know how your career will turn out in your new job. What if you need help from your former boss? And it is worth remembering that there are no irreplaceable people, time will pass, and they will hire a good worker to take your place. And in order for you to be remembered only in a positive context and spoken of as a valuable employee, it is important to know a few rules and tips on how.
When to talk about leaving your job?
Each organization has its own rules specified in the contract. You need to study it carefully, highlighting important points. In many companies, dismissal must be reported 1 month in advance, and somewhere around 2 weeks in advance. If some serious and long-term project is on the horizon, and you already know about your departure, you should warn the director so as not to let the company down. Or finish the job and only then leave the company.
How to leave your old job without hurting anyone
Before writing a letter of resignation at will, you need to think carefully about what you want to say to your boss. Of course, you may ask, why maintain a good relationship with your former employer? - But it normal. If you leave with a scandal and a cry, you can make yourself a host of enemies. Even if you don't need a letter of recommendation at all, a future boss may call for your reference. It is unlikely that after a stormy departure there will be positive memories of you. And why bother yourself and others?
Before you announce your resignation, you need to prepare with the following tips:
You can prepare a festive dinner for yourself at home, because this is a holiday for you. Such an environment will lift your spirits, because even a friendly and proper care from work upsets me. Perhaps there are people left there with whom you would not like to say goodbye.
Even if you and your superiors were not on very good terms and do not want to say words of gratitude, you still need to comply with the first point, be correct and polite. In this case, it is guaranteed that the former employer will write good recommendation. You need to look decent!
How to make an application
You can write a resignation letter of your own free will at any time, before or after you inform your boss about your decision. The main thing is to compose and submit it correctly. To avoid errors and not have to rewrite it again, and also to avoid controversial issues, you can compose it according to the following rules:
- Form it correctly. The resignation letter must be written by hand. At the top right you need to indicate the company and full name for whom the application is being written, then indicate from whom: position and full name. Afterwards, a certain place is skipped and the word “Statement” is written in the center. Next, you need to write the text: “I, full name, ask you to terminate the employment contract with me at your own request from (current date).” At the bottom, put the date the application was written and your signature. It is important to write the text no later than 2-4 weeks before dismissal, depending on the company’s rules, so everything needs to be thought out in advance.
- An application for resignation of one's own free will is one of the most common and calm methods of leaving. After a conversation with your superiors and a signed dismissal order, the accounting department must pay you a salary, compensation for unused vacation, etc. On the last day, the documents you provided upon employment are issued.
- There are times when an employer, unhappy with your departure, decides to ruin your reputation. Pretend that you are not resigning of your own free will, but that he is kicking you out. In such cases, you can try to come to an agreement. If the conversation did not take place, then know: you do not have the right to fire you during pregnancy, during maternity period (if the child is no more than 3 years old), or if you have a single-parent family with a 14-year-old child.
- It is also worth knowing that if you change your mind about quitting, you have the right to withdraw your application 2 weeks before the order is issued.
How to look for work at the same time?
It happens that you have to resign not of your own free will. It is important to read the employment contract, which will specify how long before the employer must announce dismissal, usually 1 month. Now you should only worry about one thing: where to look for a new job. If you have access to the Internet directly from your workplace, then you can search for work on websites. Write a good resume and send it to companies that have suitable vacancies. If your relationship with the director is good, you can say in advance that you are looking for a job and calmly send out your resume. Or, if you have a bad relationship with your boss, you can take a risk and look for a job without telling the bosses anything.
When you are about to quit, but have not yet decided to tell management about it, you should not rush to send out your resume. He may be seen at your company, which will cause a scandal.
Finish all the important things
Having announced your dismissal, you must first solve all the problems that have accumulated during your work. In order not to let your colleagues down, you need to tell them about leaving in advance, this is especially important for existing or planned projects. It is also important to inform your partners and clients, provide your contact details, perhaps some of them will want to maintain further cooperation with you. And this approach will only show you on the good side - as a reliable partner.
From hand to hand
It is important to take care of who will work in your place. If the dismissal occurs due to own initiative, then you are required to train the new employee. Even if for short term It will be impossible to present all the material to a beginner, but at least the main nuances must be told. It will be great if you yourself propose a candidate to your boss to take your place.
Leave a pleasant memory of yourself
When the day of departure approaches, in addition to the farewell lunch, for which you can order a cake, pie, or simply make original sandwiches, you can prepare pleasant souvenirs. These can be magnets, keychains or small figurines. You can give the director something more original.
We repeat, there is no need to burn bridges and leave slamming the door. Perhaps on old job there are still your friends with whom you will communicate in the future, or you will return to former place– who knows the future?
Morgenstern believes that if you are stuck in business, it will be useful for you to hear an independent opinion about your workload: “An outsider can help you cope with the problem.” Tell a close friend or colleague about your projects briefly. Ask them to evaluate the scale of the work you are doing and tell you honestly whether a person can handle it alone. Seek advice from your boss or get advice on how to deal with emergency situations, Davey says. Asking for help allows both of you to clarify expectations and improve your work efficiency. Let's say you say, “It takes me five hours each month to prepare a report for the finance department. Tell me how we can optimize the process?” After all, the boss himself once walked this path.
Offer solutions
According to Morgenstern, in order to have an honest conversation with the boss, you need the right attitude: “You are the boss’s partner who helps him achieve the company’s goals.” She suggests first "outlining the overall goals of the company" to make sure you're both on the same page. Then talk about what prevents you from doing them. Be very specific. For example, say, “This task requires a lot of data collection and takes a lot of time,” or “I'm currently leading a team and focus more on planning rather than the daily grind.”
The second part of the conversation is especially important: offer three ideas on how the issue under discussion can be resolved. “Never go to your boss with a problem unless you know how to solve it,” says Morgenstern. Offer, for example, to complete certain tasks quarterly rather than monthly, assign colleagues to help you on a specific project, or ask the company to hire a temporary employee to reduce the workload. Your goal is to find “projects that can be rescheduled, delegated, canceled, or reduced in scope.”
Set your priorities
It is extremely unpleasant to receive another task from your boss when you are already at the limit. “A manager often assigns work without knowing how long each task will take,” says Davey. You need to share what you are currently doing and ask how to prioritize. Morgenstern recommends asking your boss how much effort he thinks it takes to complete tasks and what he means by maximum, minimum, and sufficient effort. Morgenstern believes: you should never immediately take on new responsibilities if you are not sure that you will be able to cope with them. Better ask: “What is the work ahead? Let me evaluate my capabilities based on the projects I am already involved in. Can I answer you tomorrow? Try to gain time this way.
Offer help
Even if you are overwhelmed with work, try to help your colleagues whenever possible - this would be a tactful and thoughtful step on your part from a professional point of view. According to Davey, you should say something like this to your boss: “I don’t think I can do this project without compromising the other work I have to do, but I can find time to bring the person who will be in charge up to speed.” work for him." You may be willing to participate in brainstorming sessions, hear initial drafts of a project, or act as an attentive listener. “Be prepared to help your colleagues,” Davey continues. Morgenstern believes that offering a little help will enhance your reputation as a reliable employee focused on the company's success.
Principles to Remember
You should:
consult with a manager or colleague about how to reduce the time required to complete certain tasks;
directly ask whether priorities could be set differently or a compromise solution could be reached;
be ready to come to the rescue of colleagues and help them.
Do not do it:
overload yourself. If you refuse someone's request or ask for a delay, this does not mean that you can be accused of laziness;
immediately take on additional responsibilities. Try to buy time by telling your boss that you will evaluate your current workload and give him an answer later;
keep your colleagues in the dark if your superiors do not cooperate with you. Tell them that you are drowning in work so as not to undermine their trust.
Tell it like it is
In the lives of each of us, sometimes difficult circumstances arise that take precedence over everything else. If you're currently going through one of these periods—your mother has been diagnosed with a serious illness or your son is having trouble at school—the best thing to do, Morgenstern says, is to tell your boss right away. She suggests saying the following: “If I don’t solve this problem, my family will experience extreme stress, which will certainly affect my performance.” Speak directly and act “as confident and calm as possible.” Davey also suggests that you need to point out the random nature of such circumstances and give a time frame for overcoming them, for example: “These problems are rare, but the next two weeks will be very difficult for me, so I need help.” A kind and thoughtful boss will understand and appreciate your honesty. But trying to be a hero until you burn out is far from the best solution.
Rely on colleagues
Talking to your boss about your excessive workload does not always give the desired result. If he doesn't want to meet you halfway, Davey recommends hinting about it to your colleagues. Even if they have nothing to help you, they will at least know that you are working to the limit and cannot pull everything on yourself - their trust in you will remain. If bosses are always indifferent to your workload, Morgenstern says, it's time to think about looking for a new job. She believes that constantly working in emergency mode does not make sense.
Case #1: Offer solutions and don’t be shy to ask for advice
Lisa Sterling, after working for a year as vice president of product strategy at supplier Ceridian software for human resources management, received an offer to occupy the position of HR Director. Lisa planned to combine both positions, but after a few months, working on two fronts became an unbearable burden for her. She understood that she needed to talk about this with her boss, David Osip, general director Ceridian, however, was pretty nervous. “I never had to ask a manager for help,” she explains. “I was afraid that he would reconsider his decision to promote me and think that the job was not for me.”
Lisa started the conversation by saying that she knows the company's priorities. The conversation was necessary to make sure that she correctly understood what David wanted from her. She also provided him with a comprehensive list of projects she was currently involved in, both in product development and HR management. “Then I told David which areas I was successfully developing and which projects I was having difficulty with,” adds Sterling.
Finally, Lisa shared with him possible solutions. She suggested that some organizational initiatives be put on the backburner, as well as the release of a number of products. Another idea was to hire a director of product strategy to take over her responsibilities. The boss liked both of Lisa's proposals. In addition, he gave her some valuable advice on improving her leadership skills. “David said that as I climbed the career ladder, I needed to gradually move from operational management to developing your team,” says Sterling. “I realized that the range of my responsibilities was too wide. I needed to delegate authority to my subordinates.”
Lisa is glad that she was able to speak out. “It was like I saw the light,” she says. “If I had not asked my boss for help, I would never have received his instructions.”
Case Study #2: Be Direct and Frank and Be Prepared to Move on If Your Boss Is Reckless
Several years ago, Jeanine Truitt worked as a junior human resources specialist for a large hospital chain. The organization, located on Long Island in New York, was expanding its workforce so rapidly every year that the human resources department could barely cope with its responsibilities.
“I was involved in the selection of personnel for various positions - from entry-level to management - in 10 institutions,” recalls Janine. “My boss also assigned me to manage a number of other projects and staff planning when the number of beds in the hospital needed to be increased.”
After 10 years of working so hard in the healthcare industry, Janine was on the verge of a breakdown. She talked with her colleagues, and then asked the director for a meeting and directly said: “My current workload is unreasonably high. I was never afraid to openly express my opinion, but at the same time I didn’t want to let my colleagues, much less my patients, down.”
Janine suggested hiring junior staff for entry-level positions so she could focus on strategic positions. In addition, she asked that she be informed as early as possible about the upcoming increase in the number of beds in the hospital. Unfortunately, none of her ideas were to the liking of her boss, and a frustrated Janine again had to rely on her colleagues: “We agreed to help each other in cases where it was necessary to fill similar vacancies in the same institution, this allowed us to somewhat reduce the workload.” However, Janine continued to work to the limit, and eventually she quit.
Janine is now the director of innovation at Talent Think Innovations, a business strategy and management consulting firm. She learned a valuable lesson from her previous work. “Staff planning is one of the most important factors in determining the performance of your business,” she says. “If you want to keep customers and employees from leaving you and keep staff turnover to a minimum, make sure that the workload on your staff is always within reason.”
Sometimes we have to upset our bosses - for example, with the news that you want to move to another department or another job altogether. The famous JT O'Donnell and her colleague Dale Douten spoke about how to do this without compromising your future career.
Jeanine "JT" Tanner O'Donnell is a career development professional. She founded her own consulting firm, JTODonnell.com, and a career management blog, CAREREALISM.com, on which this short master class was published. kopecks,” her colleague Dale Douten also added. He has gained fame as a mentor, coach and columnist who blogs about recipes for professional growth.
Having gathered, this company organized a short lesson for one careerist who asked for help. The problem is this.
After four years in my role, I finally realized that I wanted to pursue a career in marketing. Now my activity is almost completely different from the one I dream about. My boss would like to see me in his position in a few years, but I am hesitant and don’t yet know how to tell him about my plans. And my plans are still unclear: stay in this company, but try to move to the department I’m interested in, or should I quit and try myself in a new place? In general, I’m afraid to approach my boss to talk about all this...
JT: "I always get worried when a client says something like 'and start with clean slate, with fresh forces a new thing.” Usually he does not take into account that he is already successful, so there is no reason to leave his old job. Unfortunately, we still don’t know what you are doing now. But let’s say you work in accounting. In many large companies There are accounting departments for marketing, so you can start there - you won’t be a complete beginner, the knowledge and skills acquired earlier will be useful to you in achieving your goal. main idea– you will continue to develop, rather than start all over again. Try your hand at the company where you currently work: spend more time with the marketing department, propose joint projects, try to ensure that your departments have as much contact as possible. You will always have time to leave the company, but I would recommend doing everything possible to continue your career here.
And here, of course, we have the question of what to do with a boss who has plans for you. Before moving on to advice on how to behave with him, let me show the situation through his eyes. Imagine that a person is counting on you, even, in some way, raising a replacement for himself, and then one day it turns out that you see a completely different scenario for the development of events and are planning to leave the company completely. Can you imagine what a blow this will be for him?
Now about how you should behave with your boss. First of all, you should be grateful to him. Develop this attitude within yourself first (to be sincere), and then move on to expressing this gratitude. Trust me, your boss deserves it. Explain that you really appreciate the opportunity to become his successor, but, alas, you fell in love with marketing and cannot see life without it. It should also say something like this: “I would be interested in staying in the company and continuing to work with you.” Along the way, explain how you can be useful to your boss in the future, how you could intersect. For example: “I can help find someone to take my place, prepare him and train him. In my absence, the department will work no worse.” Let him know that no one is going to deceive or let him down. Let him see that your plan is well thought out.”
Dale Douten: “Yes, perhaps these recommendations could work. Or it might turn out differently. Imagine your boss saying something like this: “You were like a son to me! And then he set me up like that!” However, fortunately for you, such a reaction can always be predicted - you haven’t known each other for the first day, have you? If your boss has a penchant for such dramatic behavior, take a slightly different route. Before talking to him, prepare several “alternate airfields” for yourself - find interesting vacancies in other companies, go through interviews there. You can even find something suitable in your own company - as Janine advised. Only in this case the conversation with the boss will have to be moved to last.”
The inability to refuse unpleasant assignments, uninteresting or someone else's work turns life into torture. It is especially difficult to refuse a boss - only brave and self-confident people are capable of this. How to defend your rights without the risk of losing your job.
There is a breed of people who are called trouble-free. They cannot help not only their boss, but also their friends, relatives, and acquaintances. Some of them are even proud of the fact that they are constantly approached with requests. This gives them the opportunity to feel in demand, needed, and strokes their pride. Such people often “run ahead of the locomotive” themselves and ask for all kinds of assignments.
However, among those who respond to all requests with consent, the majority still do so against their will. They do not dare to refuse and obediently say “yes,” because otherwise they will be tormented by feelings of guilt, gnawing at themselves, and engaging in self-criticism. It's easier for them to agree.
True, having said “yes”, they also experience internal dissatisfaction, because they probably had other plans or they absolutely do not want to do what they are now forced to do. But they, like those mice (or hedgehogs) who cried, injected themselves, but continued to eat the cactus, agree to do what they do not like.
In 1979, director Georgy Danelia made the film “Autumn Marathon” with Oleg Basilashvili in leading role. His hero, the already middle-aged talented translator Andrei Buzykin, is used by everyone and everything. In an effort not to offend anyone with a refusal and to help everyone who asks, he is literally torn to pieces. He doesn't have time for favorite hobby, to your personal life, because the alarm clock is ringing again, reminding you that it’s time to run to someone else’s call, to attend to someone else’s business. In fact, saying “yes” to others, he says “no” to himself and his desires, lives someone else’s life, not his own.
It is especially difficult for such people to deal with their boss. However, only brave people. After all, his request, as a rule, is not so much a request as an order. And orders, as they say in the army, are not discussed, but are carried out unquestioningly. So many bosses expect that their subordinates will rush to fulfill their request, like an order, without entering into discussions and bickering. And in most cases this is what happens. “No” will be said only by those who know their worth well and are confident that if they fall out of favor and are thrown out of work, they will have no problem finding another one. (Of course, we're talking about not about the employee’s immediate responsibilities, but about the additional workload.)
The boss himself understands perfectly well who can be given additional responsibilities and who is better left alone. He makes his choice and chooses a reliable executive employee, who, he is sure, will hurt himself, but will carry out the assignment.
How to avoid becoming a scapegoat
1. Why me again?
We suddenly found ourselves favored by our boss: he walked into the office to offer us overtime, and his eyes immediately fell on us. And this does not mean at all that the boss is more favorable to us than to other employees. He just knows that we will get down to business without further ado, even to the detriment of our own interests. And now we’re calling home: “Sorry, honey, I have to stay late at work today. So what, it's your birthday! You don’t want me to be left without work?”, “I simply have to go on this business trip! And you don’t need to be jealous of me.”
Often bosses accompany their requests with flattery: “You, and only you, are capable of coping with this task!” And now we are firmly on his hook. We will not be able to refuse him next time; it will be awkward for us not to live up to his trust.
Let's ask ourselves: why always me? Because, figuratively speaking, the executioner is looking for a victim, and the victim attracts the executioner. We ourselves have chosen the role of a reliable victim. And if we don’t want to be at someone’s beck and call for the rest of our lives, we must get out of this role.
How to make sure that the wolves are fed and the sheep are safe? How to refuse your boss and win your right to privacy tactfully, maintaining dignity and without throwing tantrums? There are several options.
2. Just say no
Social psychologist Susan Newman wrote the book “Say No to a Manipulator.” In her opinion, only those who have gotten rid of their habit of agreeing to everything can achieve success. The one who always says “no” to everyone, including his boss, will achieve more because he is focused. Constant agreement will easily destroy both reputation and career, because the employee, due to many responsibilities, will not be able to complete the main work efficiently and on time and will lose trust. A straightforward “no” can be replaced with a softer phrase: “If you don’t mind, I’ll refuse.”
However, trainees, lower and mid-level employees, those who are in probationary period and are not sure of the strength of their positions, it is better to wait a while and agree, especially if the request concerns labor activity. However, many of them usually agree to assignments that are very far from her, in the hope that this is temporary. So, the daughter of one friend, who graduated from a university with honors, is the boss of work time loaded with requests of a personal nature: to pay public utilities, pick up his child from school, etc. After refusal to Once again To fulfill such a request, nagging began on his part, and she quit. As it turned out, for the better - new job corresponded to her abilities and expectations.
So, before you say no, you should mentally consider possible consequences refusals and how prepared we are for them.
3. Always say yes
Another option is to act like a diplomat who does not say directly and firmly: “No!” If he is approached with an unwanted request, he will say: “Yes, I agree. When I have free time, I will help you." Or: “Okay, let's discuss the conditions under which this will be possible.”
The expression “Never say never” can be rephrased as: “Never say no.” The life of the hero of the film “Always Say Yes” has changed dramatically in better side, as soon as he got rid of the habit of immediately saying no. Of course, the situation is exaggerated in the film, but there is a rational grain in it.
4. “I’ll think about it”
Some people have slow reactions and cannot immediately figure out what to answer, so they immediately blurt out “no” just in case. Subsequently, they often have to regret it, but, as they say, the train has already left.
It would be more reasonable to say: “I need some time to think,” “I don’t want to let you down, so I need to review my plans before I answer.”
5. Feigning misunderstanding
In some cases, it is possible to “turn on” misunderstanding. We listen carefully to the request, showing our readiness to begin to implement it. After which we say that we want to delve into the essence of the task in more detail, so we have a number of questions that we want to clarify: what is the algorithm of our actions, who can we contact if we need advice, etc. In theory, the boss should patience will run out, and he will delegate this task to someone else.
However, using this technique is fraught with consequences: the boss will either suspect that we are playing the fool, or will doubt our adequacy.
6. Refusal must be justified
The phrase “No, because I’m busy” doesn’t sound convincing, but it’s also not worth going into lengthy explanations of why we can’t fulfill the boss’s request. Nobody will listen to them. Let us briefly note that we would really like to help, but we are currently busy with this and that, and we will ask the boss himself.
Nothing prevents us from being deceitful if the task involves overtime work, which, moreover, is not paid. Just in case, it’s better to have a ready answer, then it will look more believable: “What a pity, but I have a toothache and I made an appointment with the dentist.” Or “Unfortunately, I can’t, I ordered a car to transport my mother’s things.” There are many options. Perhaps the boss will suspect that this is just an excuse, but he won’t show it.
You can offer an alternative: “I can’t do anything today, but maybe I will be useful at another time.”
In any case, it is better to show your diplomatic abilities (the boss will appreciate them) than to refuse in a rude manner like: “I don’t get paid for this”, “This is not my responsibility”, “Look for other fools”, etc. The answer to the boss is: just say: “Good riddance! There are no irreplaceable people, and they weren’t the ones who were fired.”
7. Observe colleagues
How they react to excessive requests from their boss, and learn from their experience. It is important to make allowances for the fact that the team may have been established for a long time and what is allowed to some, for example, some familiarity in relationships, will be strange to see and hear from a new employee.
8. “Bargaining is appropriate”
Constantly loading us with new tasks, which we nevertheless successfully cope with, the boss may simply not think about the fact that we are doing this at the expense of our personal time, health and nerves. So let’s draw his attention to this fact and discuss the situation together! We are not saying no, we just want to discuss the terms under which we will continue to work.
Those who value themselves are valued by others. The one who meekly carries the load is loaded with more, as if testing his capabilities. The consequence of a conversation that took place in a sensitive manner can be mutually beneficial. The boss will not lose a competent employee, and the employee will receive some benefits for working overtime, for example, an increase in salary, time off, a flexible schedule, etc.
In the end, people treat us the way we allow them to treat us.
9. Is it advisable to say “no”?
Who knows, maybe by refusing the assignment, we are also refusing the prospects that would have opened up to us if we had agreed. For example, in an effort to quickly finish our part of the work, we did not go to a seemingly tedious meeting. And the one who did it for us was offered a new interesting project.
Only those who are not interested in moving up the career ladder can resort to constant refusals.